Friday, August 18, 2017

Found For Friday

 Dr. P. Lumb, quite proud of his academic degrees in genetics, physics, and marine biology. For the past several years, he has been working on a potion that eliminates the aging process. Before he tests it on a human subject, he chooses to test it on an animal with the mental capacities closest to a person, and so picks a dolphin. Within a week, he acquired three such animals.

His experiment is halted through many unforeseen conflicts. First, spies from a rival cosmetic company break into the premises, ransack the lab, and attempt to remove the vital vial of vim and vigor from the vault, but failed. The second problem occurred in solving the first. The doctor cheaply invests in a security system, the King of the Jungle, "Dan the Lion". The reason for this feline's discount was due to his very long cat-naps, which were 10 hours long. The doctor plopped the cat in front of the door and kept him there.

Lastly, the dolphins, after several treatments of the solution, communicated that they were having a craving for large sea birds. Lumb, feeling this was not something to be ignored, ventured into the night, captured some seagulls, and returned to the lab.

He opened the door, stepped over Dan, and suddenly the lights were flicked on by gun-totting police officers, brandishing their weapons toward Lumb. He was arrested for..."transporting gulls across staid lions for immortal porpoises."


Why do we put cups in the dishwasher and the dishes in the cupboard?


Why are goods sent by ship called CARGO and those sent by truck SHIPMENT?


How do you get off a non-stop Flight?


If a Vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a Humanitarian eat?


If money doesn't grow on trees, how come Banks have Branches?



How come Lipstick doesn't do what it says?


Why isn't a Fireman called a Water-man?


Wonder why the word funeral starts with FUN?



Who knew what time it was when the first clock was made?




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