...the Government of the United States, which gives to bigotry no sanction, to persecution no assistance, requires only that they who live under its protection should demean themselves as good citizens in giving it on all occasions their effectual support. Geo. Washington Feb. 22, 1732



Thursday, July 31, 2008

Obama in Cedar Rapids

Luncheon at Audubon's

This is Suzanne. She came out to see me when I picked Bob up for lunch. You can tell from her happy look that she is enjoying retirement. You know, teachers give their all for their profession. Suzanne gave her all and then some to be one of the greatest teachers the Ames Schools had. She was dedicated, innovative and her children loved her. I can't count the number of her former students who said that Mrs. Kelly was the best teacher they ever had.

Now that she is retired you can tell that she is enjoying having time to do things for herself (as both Bob and I do). She came out to the car to thank me for taking Bob off from her hands for a little while.


And this is Bob (of Bob's Photos). I have been putting up his photos on here for quite awhile and I love doing it. Bob is also a retired teacher who enjoys having time for himself and his photos are one of the results of his creative work. He took me to lunch today. Said I was his "Publisher" I have been telling him for years that he needs to publish a book of his eagle pictures. He has hundreds of them. Suzanne and he could collaborate on it. But perhaps they have other things to do.






We went to Audubon's at the Gateway Center. They have really done nice things with the entrance.



















These flowers were a lot prettier than they became in the harsher light of noon.






The ambiance of the restaurant is very nice. This is the ceiling over the dining room. the reflections were very interesting and I thought worth a picture.

















I have always liked this restaurant and the food was very good today.








First an appetizer. Tasty, but a tad bit salty.












Bob had the Bacon Burger. Homemade chips make it a little extra nice.














My chicken quesadilla was very tasty (a little to spicy a sauce for me so I didn't eat that part.)












We both opted for the pineapple upside down cake for dessert. Again very nice but I thought the berries on top overshadowed the pineapple. We both remembered our (different) mother's pineapple upside down cake made with pineapple rings and maraschino cherries in the center. Mom used an iron skillet to cook hers in and it was wonderful.


The most satisfying thing about the lunch was the food. The service left a lot to be desired. We were the only ones in the restaurant and there were long paused between the times the waitress took our orders and finally brought us our food. When it came time for the check we had to ask for the desert menu and then only one was brought to the table and we had to share it. Then when they finally did bring us the check she let us sit there while she had a confab with one of her buddies and Bob finally had to wave her down to come and get it. It seemed to us that with only the two of us in the place the service could have been a bit more attentive. I described her attitude as perfunctory. Not a good impression.

Thanks for stopping by, Hugs, j

Sure Signs of Summer


Hope

Unitarian Forgiveness

As a follow-up to the Post on Hate I want to share this which Fred Anderson Found on Crooks and Liars. It is written by a Unitarian and talks about forgiveness. Go read here.

It ends with this
{...}
So I will choose the hard way. I will try to forgive the Adkissons of the world who have been manipulated and conned into violence. I don’t think I’m quite ready yet to forgive the Coulters and the O’Reillys and the Malkins and the Limbaughs of this world just yet… but I will try to work on not hating them quite as much as I know they hate me. It’s a step. Maybe tomorrow I can do better.
{...}

And if a reminder was ever needed why I am and will always be a Unitarian, it is that during the candlelight service held in memory of those who died, a few of the children who had been performing in the cast of ‘Annie’ broke into song. They sang ‘Tomorrow’, in a heart-wrenching reminder that the sun will come out tomorrow.


Keep these folks in your prayers and look at what happened as a wake-up call to stand against hate and violence. There is too much good in the world to let the haters color our world with red.

Des Moines Wednesday

I had coffee with Matt this afternoon and we had a good visit. I always enjoy the time we can talk. Then it was to the Consistory Building for the Scottish Rite Members Appreciation Dinner.
I posted at the Consistory Blog and you can see more pictures there and also access an on-line album. I think I am going to change the post tomorrow as I am not real happy with it but until then you can go look. As I was leaving the building I saw these two photo OPs and so you get to see another part of Des Moines.

The Consistory Building (above) and my friend Kurt receiving his Awards (He got two of them) (below). Kurt doesn't think he deserves the award but that is probably why he deserves it. Because he doesn't know he deserves it. He just quietly does his thing and is a real asset to the Rite. You can read his take on it here but don't believe the last paragraph because he is full of it. And you know what IT is.

And finally evidence that I live with a cat. This was waiting for me in the garage by the car. Cassie went hunting.
Thanks for stopping by. J

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

From AmericaBlog



And the New York Times weighs in here.

Hate II


Shuck and Jive is the blog of a Presbyterian Minister in Pennsylvania. He has been blogging about the Knoxville event and today he writes about Billings, Montana. He talks about how in that town some skinheads tried to terrorize the people and how they responded. It is an inspiring story. I recommend that you read it starting here- Not in Our Town. Thanks Rev. Shuck for all your posts.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Random Rants


May I help you? Tonight I had two experiences with "service" I went to a restaurant and a young man waited on me and he was efficient, pleasant and courteous. I enjoyed the experience very much.

Then I went into a large Department Store (oops not really a department store any more) and the experience was very different. The reason I went was to purchase some cologne. I walked into the store and went to the counter and there was no one there to wait on me so I wandered around a little sampling the various offerings on the counter. I had come to purchase a specific scent that I had found and was looking forward to it. Eventually a frazzled looking person came over to the counter and offered to wait on me. I told her what I wanted and she got it out. The store had a special offer. If you spent a certain amount you would receive a $10 gift card. I had to mention it to her and she couldn't find one in the drawer.

Then she called someone else over to wait on me and told them she couldn't find the cards. And left. I was told by the new person that I would have to take the receipt to customer service to get my gift card. As she was ringing up the sale I decided that no, I did not have to do this. I told her to just forget it. Took my charge card and left. It would have been a $72 sale. I have been treated this way in this store before. One time I had to go and find someone to wait on me and she was putting make-up on and totally let me know that I was unimportant to her. I think this is the last time I shall go there to purchase things.

The store does not care about its customers. So Younker's you have lost me as a customer. One too many times this sort of thing has happened.

I found this picture over at Madpriest's blog. He is an Anglican and has been covering the Lambeth Conference going on right now. The one where they excluded the Bishop of New Hampshire. I am putting it in my picture dictionary to define hypocrisy.

I got a couple of comments on my blogpost on Hate. I found them very appropriate. I thank them for taking the time to write. I don't often find people commenting on my blog. Either because I moderate comments or what I am saying is not worthy of comments. I do appreciate the feedback.

I saw a guy driving his little red car tonight smoking a cigarette, talking on his cell phone and visiting with his girlfriend at the same time. I wonder how much attention he was paying to his driving.

The media is giving John McSame a pass. They hang on his every word. They are more critical of Senator Obama. McSame can lie tell boldface lies and they let it go (except for Andrea Marshall). They seem to think that he will be good for the country. I beg to differ. there is a Web Site called Fact Check that seeks to set the record straight. And it seems to be impartial. It sets the facts straight for both sides. There is a less objective site over at the Jed Report that is less friendly towards McSame. It has a little movie of Rachel Maddow and Keith Olbermann's take on the media's coverage of the 2008 campaign.

The US Postal Service shall be the subject of my last Rant tonight. I was told by Tom Dean that he had mailed a package to me last Tuesday. It has been a week and it still has not gotten here. He mailed it for O'Fallon, Missouri (I think) and it has had time to get here. A Brother mailed me a check from Newton last week and the letter looked like it had been trough a wringer. One time an old gentleman (Imagine that me calling someone old) came up and handed me a letter he had found in the gutter down the street while he was walking his dog. It contained a check for $150. The cost of the postage goes up and the service goes down.

I have one last gripe. I sent two e-mails out last week asking for information in one of them and not even the courtesy of a reply. In another one I volunteered to do something and again I was ignored. I am really wondering who taught these guys their manners? It takes very little to answer an e-mail and say " sorry, I don't have that information" or "I won't be able to use your services but thanks for volunteering." I think it is just rude not to respond and so I am seriously considering removing them from my address book. I guess I will just figure that I am not someone they want as a friend and let it go. It sure seems that way.

So there you have them - Since I live alone I don't have anyone to gripe to so you get to listen. Thanks for stopping by. Be loved. Hugs, j

Monday, July 28, 2008

Good TV


As far as I am concerned The Closer on TV is the best show going right now.

Congratulations to
Kyra Sedgwick on her 2008 Emmy Nomination. (ACTRESS IN A DRAMA)

Hate


You've got to be taught
To hate and fear,
You've got to be taught
From year to year,
It's got to be drummed
In your dear little ear
You've got to be carefully taught.

You've got to be taught to be afraid
Of people whose eyes are oddly made,
And people whose skin is a diff'rent shade,
You've got to be carefully taught.

You've got to be taught before it's too late,
Before you are six or seven or eight,
To hate all the people your relatives hate,
You've got to be carefully taught!

The Broadway Musical "South Pacific" has the above song in it. I choke up whenever I hear it. IT SAYS SO MUCH! It is talking about Racism but it could just as well be talking about homophobia or any of the myriad other hatreds that permeate our society.

I was talking with my friend Craig the other day and the subject of the young man who killed his classmate came up. He is to be tried as an adult. I said that I thought that was sad. When asked why I quoted the above song. He was not born that way. How many of you have ever held a little baby. A newborn, when it becomes aware has only love for those who care for and feed and cuddle it. There is much joy in a child. Much love. What happens? What happens when that same child comes to school and becomes (or is already) a bully? They weren't born that way. They didn't grow that way naturally. The vast majority of people aren't that way - or at least they didn't used to be. Somewhere along the way they were taught to hate.

It may not have been a conscious choice on the part of their parents/teachers/friends but it happens. Why? What takes a sweet little child and turns them into a hate machine?

This past week-end some parents and families were sitting in a church. A man (?) came into that church with the express purpose of killing people. He had a shotgun. He hated. It turns out that this was a hate crime. Or at least that is the way it is being reported. You see this was not a "Christian Church" It was a Unitarian Church. I have friends who are Unitarian and they are fine loving and caring people. They probably express more compassion and caring than many so called "Christians." They certainly don't teach hatred and they don't go around carrying signs that say "God Hates Fags" and picket soldiers funerals. They don't spew forth that hatred by making statements that the reason for the tornadoes and hurricane Katrina was because God wants to punish the sinful city of New Orleans or other places. They were quietly and joyfully watching children perform a musical. That is one of the ways they celebrate their spirituality. By performance. Celebrating the joy that God gives to all of us. (More here.)

So this liberal hating person came in and in one moment he tried to destroy all of that - because of his hate. We allow that hatred to grow and fester every time we do not speak out against injustice. Every time we allow blacks or gays or anyone to be treated as less than human. Every time one of the "right-wing" of the Republican party decides to demonize gay people and come out against gay people being allowed to marry or to adopt. When they repeat the mantra "I'm for 'family values.' " When they don't speak out against injustice. They have even decided that the only way to win an election is to use the gays as whipping boys. Oh no you say? I have seen it on TV. It happened before and it continues to happen. The Karl Roves of the party don't seem to believe in their own values enough to put them before the world so they have to set forth lies about others and use fear tactics to win elections. And while they are doing that they are giving their permission and even encouraging these hate mongers to go into churches and schools and other places and kill people.

I heard about more bombings on the news. In India and other middle eastern countries. A religion of hate? We talk about the number of dead American soldiers in Iraq and leave out the wounded. We leave out the number of troops of our allies who have been killed and maimed and we totally dismiss the Iraqi men, women and children who have been killed and maimed in this horrible crime against humanity. We call it a war against terrorism but we have our own terrorists here. Terrorists who, like those abroad, have been carefully taught to be that way.

If you get right down to it the war on terrorism is not because of something Osama Bin Laden and his carefully taught extremists did. It is because of something we did and continue to do. The cowboy in the White House is largely responsible for the climate of hate and fear in the world today. And the frightening snakes in pastor's clothing who give their people license to hate are responsible for the climate of hate and fear in the United States. They are carefully teaching the children that it is all right to hate. It is all right to maim. It is all right to kill.

And hypocrites that they are they do it in the name of the most gentle loving person who ever walked the face of this earth. The person who called God his "father" and told us that we could also be the children of God. That person who did not use fear or hatred to bring God to us but who showed us that GOD IS LOVE - THAT GOD IS LIGHT - And in him is no darkness at all." That person whose message has been completely forgotten by those who are supposed to be his followers.

Even the Anglicans, meeting in England, have given permission for their membership to hate by excluding the gay Bishop of New Hampshire from attending. Well Gene Robinson has more of Christ in him that does the Archbishop of Canterbury who just seems more interested in preserving his power and privilege than in living his (so-called) Christianity. Bishop Robinson is quietly witnessing Christ to the world by his gentle prayerful activities this week. He is writing a blog about it. He inspires me because, even though he could hate, he doesn't.

So do I say all preachers are this way? All politicians? Of course not, I know several who are also loving gentle quiet people who witness to God and Christ in a loving way and who show by their actions that they know a God of Love. However sometimes they are silent and in that silence they allow haters to grow. Strong stances have to be taken against bullies and hatred. You can't keep quiet. You have to show the love that God has for every thing He has created and he created everything. He did not create some to be saved and some to be cast into flames. He created everything and "behold it was very good." When we recognize that and forgive those who hate us as Christ did we will begin to build the world that was shown to us as a possibility 2008 years ago.

Thanks for stopping by. And remember - You are Love. Hugs, j

After The Storm


Bob and his son Ryan were coming back from Indiana and there were storms. He got this shot on the way home. Thanks, Bob. As usual a great shot. (Click on the picture to embiggen it. It really looks nice larger.)

Sunday, July 27, 2008

The Letter "G"

The Iowa Systematic Enlightenment Course says;
"The letter "G" is a symbol of geometry and also that of Deity. by the letter "G" we are reminded that our every act is done in the sight of the Supreme Being and that Divine Providence is over all our lives. To the operative craftsman, geometry provided the principles of design and construction whereby he labored. It also portrays the order and harmony of parts found in the universe. The letter "G" is placed in the center of the Masonic Emblems worn by U. S. Masons, but not by Masons in England or other nations of the British Commonwealth."

I found this in a document called The Mason's Lady which is designed to be given to family members of new Masons.
The most widely recognized symbol of the Fraternity is the Square and Compasses with the letter “G” in the Center.

Members wear it to remind themselves of their obligation to the lessons learned in their Lodges, and to identify their membership to other Masons and all people. Masonic symbols have wide meanings, some directly related to the tools used by actual Operative Masons and some, represent the need for order and direction in life. The letter “G” represents Geometry and also it is the initial of God, the Supreme Architect of the Universe.
A friend and former principal of mine told me that when he was a kid he bought a pin like the one above. Some old Mason grabbed him and told him that he should not be wearing it. It sort of soured him on the fraternity. See his name was Glenn and he thought it stood for him. It is too bad he was treated that way. It could have been explained carefully to him as a little kid and he could have been told to put it away in a drawer until he was old enough to join the Lodge and then he could wear it. As it is we lost a potential member.

I also found this while I was looking around and I kind of like it.

The Pythagoreans reverenced numbers as sacred; geometry was to them the sacred science. It initial letter, Gamma, a square, was especially revered. The Gamma looks like a square used by builders; it was the symbol of the actual, four-sided, or geometrical square, the first whole number square, and therefore, the representative of deity, the four-letter word, the tetragrammaton.

Symbols are easily converted the one into the other and back again. If the Gamma, which appeared like a workman’s square, was a symbol of the geometrical square, which in turn was a symbol of Deity, then, by a simple reconversion looked like Gamma, which in one position looked like the square of the workman, soon came to symbolize the tetragrammaton or four-letter word.

The Greek Gamma was rounded into the Latin “C.” For a while it stood for both the sounds of “g” and “k.” Later (third century B.C.), a slight change was made in the Latin “c” which stood for the soft, or “j” sound - and behold, our modern Roman “G.” Hence, by a path straight to any but mind demanding documentary proof, we place the origin of our “G,” as representing both God and Geometry, as far back as the Pyrhogoreans (sixth century, B.C.).

Another interesting hypothesis - it is hardly more - calls attention to the fact that three geometrical forms appear in the Greek alphabet, as we have seen; Gamma (G) is a square standing on end, the horizontal arm extended to the right. Omicron (O) is a circle, Delta (D) is a triangle.

Writing one letter on top of another to form a monogram is very old. The three Greek letters, Gamma, Omicron and Delta may be combined in a monogram to form a very fair conventionalizing of our letter “G” inside a triangle which looks not unlike our modern square and compasses!

I have always found the lecture on the letter "G" interesting. Part of it says that Freemasonry has survived in spite of the ravages of time. The attentive ear and the instructive tongue being the means whereby our symbolism is transmitted from one generation to another. Those who have heard the Fellowcraft lectures which culminate in the explanation of the letter "G" cannot help but be impressed with this beautiful symbol of our fraternity.

And finally an admonition from Harry Carr.

If Masonry does what we claim for it,
We should guard our tongues, lest we forget
To use that Great High name with care,
While at work, at play, or engaged in prayer.

For the world is watching both you and me,
To see if we honor the Letter "G";
And our lives and teachings they compare.
To see if they're Plumb, and on the Square.

You can read more about the letter "G" here, here, here, here and here.

Thanks for stopping by. Hugs, jcs

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Battle Cry





Thanks, John.

Pond Critters

Bob sends along two more pictures. Did he find these critters out at a lake in rural Iowa? Or perhaps at a farm pond? No, they live in a pond in the center of Des Moines. South of the Des Moines Art Center is a pond and Bob visited them there. The Art Center is on my list of places to visit soon. It is a treasure. The fellow below is probably Mr. Phrog's Iowa Cousin - Pharley.


And this reminds me of a perfectly awful story - one that we told in high school and thought was so funny. My sense of humor has matured but I share it with you anyway (only because I found it on the Internets):

One day, a Rabbit, a Turtle, and a Buzzard were planning on starting a farm. The Turtle and Buzzard were digging holes, and they sent the Rabbit out to find horse manure, to fertilize the land. While the rabbit is out finding manure, the turtle and buzzard strike oil. They become instantly rich. When the rabbit returns, he sees a mansion. He rings the doorbell, and a butler answers. The rabbit says "where is the buzzard and the turtle?". The butler replies "Mr. BuzzARD is out by the yard, and Mr. TurtEL is out by the well." the rabbit says, " Tell Mr TurtEL who is out by the well, and Mr BuzzARD, whos out by the yard, that Mr. RabBIT is here with the sh*t!"

Wordzzle


This is the only on-going Blogthing I am participating in - No Ruby Tuesday, Skywatch Friday, etc. And today it really is on Saturday because of our Specialis Procer meeting yesterday. Not a great story this week. But next week's words look very interesting
Click Button for rules

Ten Word Challenge will be: follow-up, buffalo wings, silversmith, furniture, as the crow flies, little red roadster, photograph, pencil pusher, argument, streaking

And for the Mini Challenge: Ireland, mashed potatoes, book worm, fog horn, T.S. Eliot

Continued from here.

“I am not sure when you can meet her,” said Mr. Phrog. “She is very shy. I will be glad to introduce her to you if I can win the argument we are having about her needing to be less of a book worm and get out more.”

“Well,” said Sallyie, I know what I can give her for a gift. I have a beautiful first edition of T.S. Eliott published in Ireland, I know she would love that. Now I must get to work. I need to polish the furniture and then run to the silversmith to pick up my silver candlesticks. Do you think I should use the little red roadster to go or the limo?”

“Oh, take the roadster,” said her sister Saydie “I like to think of you streaking down the road. Oh and while you are out would you pick up some mashed potatoes and some buffalo wings for supper? If only you could go as the crow flies then you would be there and back in a flash."

“I imagine that can be arranged.” said Sallyie, “Now Phrog, I want to suggest that you take your honeymoon trip to Ireland. Come look at this photograph. We took it last year on our trip for the Order of Salamanders to look for an International Headquarters. It was so beautiful! We stood there on the coast and listened to the fog horn and drank Irish Whiskey. “

“Bushmills or Jamesons” asked the Phrog. “Oh never mind.” I don’t really enjoy either of them I much prefer Scotch. I am just a pencil pusher after all. Our taste are simple.”
With that he bowed to the girls, turned away from them and jumped in his Porsche and sped down the road. Off to meet Esmeralda for lunch at the Amphibian Alehouse..

"Well," said Saydie, "that was rather abrupt and rude. Perhaps he doesn't want us to meet her after all."


Next Week's Ten Word Challenge will be: ghastly, excrement, bill of sale, vague, thicket, precarious, life long ambition, gunnery sergeant, posthumous, bellowed

And for the Mini Challenge: lap of luxury, yellow-bellied sapsucker, quinine, generalization, abnormality

Our First Stated Meeting.



The Room was ready

















The Bothers gathered











Greetings and friendly handshakes.












Pictures taken - The gavel sounded and the first stated meeting of Specialis Procer Lodge U.D. was held. Probably a record. Less than one hour.
Our Grand Master was in attendance. We all enjoyed having him with us and his remarks.






Then to Tursi's Latin King Restaurant for the Festive Board. Where we ate a wonderful meal, enjoyed great fellowship and listened to the first paper presented by Worshipful Master Brother Tim Bonney.



You can see the excitement and happiness on the Brothers faces. This is what our Lodge is all about.

What started as a discussion and plans for a dinner club has grown into Iowa's first "Restoration" Lodge. We feel like proud papa's. Now to see our "baby" grow and prosper.






It was an "overflow crowd" so Craig and I shared a booth.

It took a lot of work to get to this point. Now we need to work to continue to grow. We received two petitions at the meeting. Had a "Chain of Union" at the end of the meeting.

Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for Brethren to dwell together in Unity.

Thanks for stopping by. Remember you are loved. Hugs, j

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Found for Fridays

After going through a virus attack,
Losing a hard drive,
Fighting off hackers,
Upgrading all my software,
Installing fire-walls,
Being threatened with being cut-off by my email provider,
And a host of other problems...

I have fixed my computer.

NOW it works exactly the way I want it to!

A Russian scientist and a Czechoslovakian scientist had spent their lives studying the grizzly bear. Each year they petitioned their respective governments to allow them to go to Yellowstone to study the bears.

Finally their request was granted, and they immediately flew to New York and on west to Yellowstone. They reported to the ranger station and were told that it was the grizzly mating season and it was too dangerous to go out and study the animals. They pleaded that this was their only chance, and finally the ranger relented.

The Russian and the Czech were given portable phones and told to report in every day. For several days they called in, and then nothing was heard from the two scientists. The rangers mounted a search party and found the camp completely ravaged, with no sign of the missing men.

They followed the trail of a male and a female bear. They found the female and decided they must kill the animal to find out if she had eaten the scientists because they feared an international incident.

They killed the female animal and opened the stomach to find the remains of the Russian. One ranger turned to the other and said, "You know what this means, don't you?"

The other ranger responded, "The Czech is in the male."


FOR THOSE WHO LOVE THE PHILOSOPHY OF AMBIGUITY….( as well as the
idiosyncrasies of English)

1. ONE TEQUILA, TWO TEQUILA, THREE TEQUILA, FLOOR ……
2. ATHEISM IS A NON-PROPHET ORGANIZATION.
3. IF MAN EVOLVED FROM MONKEYS AND APES, WHY DO WE STILL HAVE MONKEYS AND APES?
4. THE MAIN REASON THAT SANTA IS SO JOLLY IS BECAUSE HE KNOWS WHERE ALL THE BAD GIRLS LIVE.
5. I WENT TO A BOOKSTORE AND ASKED THE SALESWOMAN, “WHERE’S THE
SELF-HELP SECTION?” SHE SAID IF SHE TOLD ME, IT WOULD DEFEAT THE PURPOSE.
6. WHAT IF THERE WERE NO HYPOTHETICAL QUESTIONS?
7. IF A DEAF PERSON SIGNS SWEAR WORDS, DOES HIS MOTHER WASH HIS HANDS WITH SOAP?
8. IF SOMEONE WITH MULTIPLE PERSONALITIES THREATENS TO KILL HIMSELF, IS IT CONSIDERED A HOSTAGE SITUATION?



9. IS THERE ANOTHER WORD FOR SYNONYM?
10. WHERE DO FOREST RANGERS GO TO “GET AWAY FROM IT ALL?”
11. WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU SEE AN ENDANGERED ANIMAL EATING AN ENDANGERED PLANT?
12. IF A PARSLEY FARMER IS SUED, CAN THEY GARNISH HIS WAGES?
13. WOULD A FLY WITHOUT WINGS BE CALLED A WALK?
14. WHY DO THEY LOCK GAS STATION BATHROOMS? ARE THEY AFRAID SOMEONE WILL CLEAN THEM?
15. If A TURTLE DOESN’T HAVE A SHELL, IS HE HOMELESS OR NAKED?
16. CAN VEGETARIANS EAT ANIMAL CRACKERS?



17. IF THE POLICE ARREST A MIME, DO THEY TELL HIM HE HAS THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT?
18. WHAT WAS THE BEST THING BEFORE SLICED BREAD?
19. ONE NICE THING ABOUT EGOTISTS: THEY DON’T TALK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE.
20. HOW IS IT POSSIBLE TO HAVE A CIVIL WAR?
21. IF ONE SYNCHRONIZED SWIMMER DROWNS, DO THE REST DROWN TOO?
22. IF YOU ATE BOTH PASTA AND ANTIPASTO, WOULD YOU STILL BE HUNGRY?
23. IF YOU TRY TO FAIL, AND SUCCEED, WHICH HAVE YOU DONE?
24. WHOSE CRUEL IDEA WAS IT FOR THE WORD “LISP” TO HAVE “S” IN IT?
25. WHY ARE HEMORRHOIDS CALLED “HEMORRHOIDS” INSTEAD OF “ASSTEROIDS”?
26. WHY IS IT CALLED TOURIST SEASON IF WE CAN’T SHOOT AT THEM?
27. WHY IS THERE AN EXPIRATION DATE ON SOUR CREAM?




On the first day, God created the dog and said:
'Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years.'

The dog said: 'That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?'
So God agreed.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said
'Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a 20 year life span.'

The monkey said: 'Monkey tricks for 20 years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back 10 like the dog did?'
And God agreed.

On the third day, God created the cow and said:
'You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of 60 years.'

The cow said: 'That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for 60 years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?'
And God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created man and said:
'Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you 20 years.'

But man said: 'Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my 20, the 40 the cow gave back, the 10 the monkey gave back, and the 10 the dog gave back, that makes 80, okay?'
'Okay,' said God, 'You asked for it.'

So that is why for our first 20 years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next 40 years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next 10 years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren.
And for the last 10 years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service


Enjoy your weekend. Remember it is nice to be important but it is much more important to be nice. Laugh long, loud and hard. It's good for the soul. Love someone, Hugs jcs

"This is the moment"


And he said"

People of the world - look at Berlin!

Look at Berlin, where Germans and Americans learned to work together and trust each other less than three years after facing each other on the field of battle.
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People of the world - look at Berlin, where a wall came down, a continent came together, and history proved that there is no challenge too great for a world that stands as one.
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But the burdens of global citizenship continue to bind us together. A change of leadership in Washington will not lift this burden. In this new century, Americans and Europeans alike will be required to do more - not less. Partnership and cooperation among nations is not a choice; it is the one way, the only way, to protect our common security and advance our common humanity.

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That is why the greatest danger of all is to allow new walls to divide us from one another.

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This is the moment when we must defeat terror and dry up the well of extremism that supports it.

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This is the moment when we must come together to save this planet. Let us resolve that we will not leave our children a world where the oceans rise and famine spreads and terrible storms devastate our lands. Let us resolve that all nations - including my own - will act with the same seriousness of purpose as has your nation, and reduce the carbon we send into our atmosphere. This is the moment to give our children back their future. This is the moment to stand as one.

{...} every language is spoken in our country; every culture has left its imprint on ours; every point of view is expressed in our public squares. What has always united us - what has always driven our people; what drew my father to America's shores - is a set of ideals that speak to aspirations shared by all people: that we can live free from fear and free from want; that we can speak our minds and assemble with whomever we choose and worship as we please.
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People of Berlin - and people of the world - the scale of our challenge is great. The road ahead will be long. But I come before you to say that we are heirs to a struggle for freedom. We are a people of improbable hope. With an eye toward the future, with resolve in our hearts, let us remember this history, and answer our destiny, and remake the world once again.
Barak Obama


Read the entire text of his historic speech here.