Found For Friday

 Papa mole, mama mole, and  baby mole, 
all live together in a little mole  hole. 

One day, papa mole sticks his head out of the hole, sniffs the  air and said, 'Yummy! I smell maple syrup!' 

The mama mole sticks her head out of the hole, 
sniffs  the air and said, 'Oh, Yummy! I smell honey!' 

Now baby mole is trying to stick his head out of the hole to  sniff the air, but can't because the bigger moles are in the way. This makes  him whine, 'Geez, all I can smell is- 

   


MOL ASSES ! 

 Top Signs You're At A Bad Motel 

The "complimentary" paper tells you that President Kennedy has died. 

The mint on the pillow starts moving when you come close to it. 

There is still some stuff that they put around crime scenes that is yellow 

The pictures are not placed for decoration but to cover up recent bullet holes. 

 You have to wait until the guy next door is done with the towel so you can use it. 

There's a chalk outline in the bed when you pull back the covers. 

 The desk clerk has to move the body in order to get some ice for you. 

The Only TV station you can get is a porno channel with roseanne on it. 

The wake up call comes courtesy of police helicopter. 

 During a commercial airline flight an experienced Air Force Pilot was seated next to a young mother with a babe in arms. When the baby began crying during the descent for landing, The mother began nursing the infant as discreetly as possible. 

The pilot pretended not to notice, and, upon disembarking, he gallantly offered his assistance to help with the various baby-related items. 

When the young mother expressed her gratitude, the pilot responded, "Gosh, that's a good looking baby, and he sure was hungry!" 

Somewhat embarrassed, the mother explained that her pediatrician said that the time spent on the breast would help alleviate the pressure in the baby's ears. 

The Air Force Pilot sadly shook his head, and in true pilot fashion exclaimed, 

"And all these years, I've been chewing gum."

 An aged farmer and his wife were leaning against the edge of their pig-pen when the old woman wistfully recalled that the next week would mark their golden wedding anniversary. 

"Let's have a party, Homer," she suggested. "Let's kill a pig." 

The farmer scratched his grizzled head. "Gee, Ethel," he finally answered, "I don't see why the pig should take the blame for something that happened fifty years ago."

 A husband and wife are shopping in their local supermarket.
The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart.

"What do you think you're doing?" asks the wife.

"They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans" he replies.

"Put them back, we can't afford them" demands the wife, and so they carry on shopping.

A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket.

"What do you think you're doing?" asks the husband.

"It's my face cream. It makes me look beautiful," replies the wife.

Her husband retorts: "So does 24 cans of Budweiser and it's half the price."

That's him on Aisle 5 - he never knew what hit him...

 How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.

Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!

A cartoonist was found dead in his home.    Details are sketchy.

 I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

Haunted French pancakes give me the crêpes.

England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.