Found For Friday

One day, Little Johnny‘s class went on a field trip to a wig factory. His father, who worked at the county morgue, had the day off from work, so he came along as a chaperone. When the students got to the conveyor belt where the wigs were being processed, Little Johnny couldn’t see, because he was so little, so he stood up on his father’s shoulders to get a better view. So there he was, standing on the coroner watching all the curls go by.

How does the Man in the Moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.

If anyone knows how to fix some hinges, my door is always open....

Raceway builders believe that one good turn deserves another.

While most puns make me feel numb,

mathematics puns always make me feel number.

The dental hygienist was very upset with the dentist when she retired.

After 25 years, all he gave her was some lousy plaque.

I keep getting hit by the same bike, at the same time and place, day after day...

It's a vicious cycle.

In Jamaica, a steak and Kidney pie costs £2.30. An apple pie costs £1.90. A chicken and mushroom pie costs £2.25.

In Trinidad and Tobago, a steak and kidney pie costs £3.00. A rhubarb pie is £1.35 and a chicken pie without mushrooms is £1.20.

These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.

Orion's Belt is a big waist of space.

 

Lamp factories have light workloads.

I used to not like Newtons, but now they're a favorite snack. Go fig.

If you want me to be Frank,

I'm going to have to change my name.

 

I'm against picketing.

But I don't know how to show it.