Found For Friday

 Brass blazed, strings sang, and timpani boomed the finale to Venet’s Concerto, but when the orchestra lulled for the star instrument, there was silence.

The xylophone player lay unconscious under a fallen stage light.

“Don’t move him,” said the conductor. “He might have percussion.”

Not even the piccolo player laughed.

True: Univ. of Pittsburgh has hired goats to eat up

the overgrowth on the campus.

Name of the company that rents them:

Have U Herd. Kids These Days.

I was told to invest in the stock market.

I am now part-owner of a chicken broth factory.

I crossed a Collie with a Lhasa Apso and got a Collapso:

a dog that folds for easy transport.

I crossed a Pointer with a Setter and got a Pointsetter:

a traditional Christmas pet.

I crossed a Pekingese with a Lhasa Apso and got a Peekasso:

an abstract dog.

I crossed an Irish Water Spaniel with an English Springer Spaniel and got an Irish Springer: a dog fresh and clean as mountain air.

I crossed a Terrier with a Bulldog and got Terribull:

not a good dog.

I crossed a Bloodhound with a Labrador and got a Blabador:

a dog that barks incessantly.