Found For Friday

 This must be an aerobics class," Tom worked out.

• "I couldn't believe there were 527,986 bees in the swarm!" Tom recounted.

• "Don't you know my name?" asked Tom swiftly.

• "Your fly is undone," was Tom's zippy rejoinder.

• "I only have diamonds, clubs and spades," said Tom heartlessly.

Do twins ever realize that one of them was unplanned?

Yesterday I swallowed some food coloring.

I'm ok. But I feel like I dyed inside.

 

Using deodorant is no sweat.

No matter how much you push the envelope, it will still be stationery.

 

Bad puns.

That's how eye roll.

If you don't pay your exorcist, you might get repossessed.

 

Amenities - the Greek goddess of luxury

I am not sure if the "b" in "subtle" is silent or just really subtle. 

I tried some bear stew, it was a little grizzly.

Why is the milk wearing a leather jacket and smoking a cigarette?!?

It must have gone bad..