Found For Friday - Geek edition.

• There are only 10 types of people in the world: those that understand binary and those that don’t.
• Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
• Be nice to the nerds, for all you know they might be the next Bill Gates!
• Artificial intelligence usually beats real stupidity.
• To err is human – and to blame it on a computer is even more so.
• CAPS LOCK – Preventing Login Since 1980.

• The truth is out there. Anybody got the URL?
• The Internet: where men are men, women are men, and children are FBI agents.
• Some things Man was never meant to know. For everything else, there’s Google.

• The box said ‘Requires Windows Vista or better’. So I installed LINUX.
• UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.
• In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?

• C://dos
  C://dos.run
  run.dos.run
• Bugs come in through open Windows.
• Penguins love cold, they wont survive the sun.

• Unix is user friendly. It’s just selective about who its friends are.
• Failure is not an option. It comes bundled with your Microsoft product.
• NT is the only OS that has caused me to beat a piece of hardware to death with my bare hands.

• My daily Unix command list: unzip; strip; touch; finger; mount; fsck; more; yes; unmount; sleep.
• Microsoft: “You’ve got questions. We’ve got dancing paperclips.”
• Erik Naggum: “Microsoft is not the answer. Microsoft is the question. NO is the answer.”

• Windows isn’t a virus, viruses do something.
• Computers are like air conditioners: they stop working when you open Windows.
• Mac users swear by their Mac, PC users swear at their PC.

• If at first you don’t succeed; call it version 1.0.
• My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.
• I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
• The code that is the hardest to debug is the code that you know cannot possibly be wrong.

• Beware of programmers that carry screwdrivers.
• Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
• The beginning of the programmer’s wisdom is understanding the difference between getting program to run and having a runnable program.
• I’m not anti-social; I’m just not user friendly.

• Hey! It compiles! Ship it!
• If Ruby is not and Perl is the answer, you don’t understand the question.
• The more I C, the less I see.
• COBOL programmers understand why women hate periods.

• Michael Sinz: “Programming is like sex, one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.”
• If you give someone a program, you will frustrate them for a day; if you teach them how to program, you will frustrate them for a lifetime.
• Programmers are tools for converting caffeine into code.
• My attitude isn’t bad. It’s in beta.

• Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue.
• E-mail returned to sender, insufficient voltage.
• All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?
• Black holes are where God divided by zero.
• If I wanted a warm fuzzy feeling, I’d antialias my graphics!

• If brute force doesn’t solve your problems, then you aren’t using enough.
• SUPERCOMPUTER: what it sounded like before you bought it.
• Evolution is God’s way of issuing upgrades.
• Linus Torvalds: “Real men don’t use backups, they post their stuff on a public ftp server and let the rest of the world make copies.”

• Hacking is like sex. You get in, you get out, and hope that you didn’t leave something that can be traced back to you.

• There are three kinds of people: those who can count and those who can’t.
• Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world’s population.
• Hand over the calculator, friends don’t let friends derive drunk

• An infinite crowd of mathematicians enters a bar. The first one orders a pint, the second one a half pint, the third one a quarter pint… “I understand”, says the bartender – and pours two pints.
• 1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d.

 So, a neutron walks into a bar. "I’d like a beer" he says. The bartender promptly serves up a beer. "How much will that be?" asks the neutron.
"For you?" replies the bartender, "no charge."

 Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.

 A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm, and says: ‘A beer please, and one for the road.’

 Mushroom in bar: “A round of drinks for everyone!” Customer: “Well, he seems like a fun guy.”

Have a Great Week-end!