I recently bought a young
registered Black Angus bull. I put him
out with the herd but he just ate grass
and wouldn't even look at a cow.I was
beginning to think I had paid more for
that bull than he was worth. Anyhow,
I had the Vet come and have a look at
him. He said the bull was very healthy,
but possibly just a little young, so he
gave me some pills to feed him once
per day.
The bull started to service the cows within two days -- all
my cows! He even broke through the fence and bred with
all of my neighbour's cows! He's like a machine!
I don't know what was in the pills the Vet gave him but
they kind of taste like peppermint.
The other day I held the door open for a clown.
I thought it was a nice jester.
Most airline food is pretty bad, but their haggis is just plane offal.
Dr. Jekyll's more successful second formula turned him into a world-class sprinter rather than a violent psychopath, proving that you can run but you can't always Hyde.
Isn't the Grand Canyon just gorges?
I tried to play the shoehorn but got only footnotes.
Most boat owners are afraid of buying new hats because they hate cap sizing.
I went to a dance with a broken leg. During the slow dances my date could tell that I had a crutch on her.
Homonyms are a reel waist of thyme.
Definition of a will: a dead give away.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.
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