Friday, December 30, 2016

Found For Friday

An anthropologist is studying a primitive society in the middle of the jungle when he develops constipation. Finding he has run out of medicine for that particular type of dysfunction, he tells the medicine doctor of the tribe he is studying. The medicine man tells him not to worry; his people sometimes suffer from the same malady but they simply chew the leaves of a particular fern. The anthropologist, figuring that he has nothing to lose (the fern wasn't poisonous), decided to try this herbal medicine.

The next morning he bumps into the medicine man, who asks if everything came out all right. The anthropologist replied that ferns had, indeed, worked very well, adding, "With fronds like these, who needs enemas?"

Never marry a tennis player. Love means nothing to them.

A song told me to Deck the I did.
Mr. and Mrs. Hall are not very happy.

The sporting goods store is having a big paddle sale,
it is quite the oar deal.

Are fish smart because they spawn good ideas while in schools?

When a new baby comes into a family, many changes are necessary.

Those who jump off a bridge in Paris are in Seine.

A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.

"I need a pencil sharpener," said Tom bluntly.

"Oops! There goes my hat!" said Tom off the top of his head.

I can no longer hear anything," said Tom deftly.

"I have a split personality," said Tom, being frank.

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