Found For Friday

  I have been in many places, but I've never been in Cahoots. Apparently, you can't go alone. You have to be in Cahoots with someone.

I've also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there.

I have, however, been in Sane. They don't have an airport; you have to be driven there.

I have made several trips there, thanks to my children, friends, family and work.

 I would like to go to Conclusions, but you have to jump, and I'm not too much on physical activity anymore.

I have also been in Doubt. That is a sad place to go, and I try not to visit there too often.

 I've been in Flexible, but only when it was very important to stand firm.

Sometimes I'm in Capable, and I go there more often as I'm getting older.

 One of my favorite places to be is in Suspense! It really gets the adrenalin flowing and pumps up the old heart!
At my age I need all the stimuli I can get!

I may have been in Continent, and I don't remember what country I was in. It's an age thing. They tell me it is very wet and damp there.

Pencils could be made with erasers at both ends, but what would be the point?

I was arrested after my therapist suggested I take something for my kleptomania.

A hungry traveller stops at a monastery and is taken to the kitchens. A brother is frying chips.  

'Are you the friar?' he asks.  

'No.I'm the chip monk,' he replies.

Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I'm OK, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside.

What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway).

Two peanuts were walking in a tough neighborhood and one of them was a-salted.

A motorcycle rider with bad teeth is the leader of the plaque.