Found For Friday

: IRISH ART YOU MUST HAVE SEEN

*At the National Art Gallery in Dublin, a husband and wife were staring at a portrait that had them completely confused.*

*The painting depicted 3 black men totally naked, sitting on a bench. Two

of the figures had black penises, but the one in the middle had a pink penis.  The curator of the gallery realized that they were having trouble

interpreting the painting and offered his personal assessment.  He went on for over half an hour explaining how it depicted the sexual emasculation of

African Americans in a predominately white, patriarchal society.  'In fact', he pointed out, 'some serious critics believe that the pink penis also reflects the cultural and sociological oppression experienced by gay men in contemporary society'.*

*After the curator left, an Irishman approached the couple and said, 'Would you like to know what the painting is really about?' *

*'Now why would you claim to be more of an expert than the curator of the gallery, asked the couple?*

*'Because I am the artist, who painted the picture,' he replied. 'In fact, there are no African Americans depicted at all. They're just three Irish coal miners. The guy in the middle went home for lunch.* 

Escaped snakes make some people hiss-terical.

 When the mayor wanted to slash the budget he turned to a fund razor.

 Pencils could be made with erasers at both ends, but what would be the point?

Before a mother knows the sex of her baby it's a hidden agender. 

Woke up this morning to find a lion AND a witch in my wardrobe.

When I asked them what they were doing, they shouted: 'Narnia business!'

My friend was fired from his job at the road department for stealing. I have to say I saw it coming. The last time I was at his house all the signs were there.

Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

Doctors feel fine on ships because they are accustomed to see sickness.