Blame Game - Just Sayin'

Right now in our country we are playing a "blame game"  Who is to blame for the tragedy in Arizona?  Could it be Sarah Palin with her targets on a map, the Tea Party with their signs that "this time they came unarmed."

Those on the right are beginning to lay the blame on the left because, well of course it is always their fault.

As I think about it I think about the other things in our society that really have been bothering me.  The bullying that goes on in schools that have lead to a "silent holocaust" of kids killing themselves over someones bullying and calling them "gay" and it isn't just kids.

Politicians regularly level hateful ads at each other during a campaign and yet when the campaign is over they seem to be able to get beyond the rhetoric and work with each other.  We have had many examples of the way things are in this country but none more so than the way kids treat each other and where do they learn this.? Because, you know they have to be taught.  I saw the last part of a spot on TV this morning where a mother was excusing her daughter's behavior as "well she is just sassy."  Is it all right to be "just sassy" or is that bullying?

The behavior of the child was learned at the feet of the adult. When we drive down the road and someone cuts us off what is our reaction? Do we give them the finger? Swear at them?  Think about it. What are we teaching our children.  The kids today (many of them) grow up with privilege.  They live in nice homes with plenty of food, way too many clothes and toys, electronic gagets and an abundance of material things.

What they lack is guidance.  Even when they go to church (if they go) they are liable to be told about "sinners" and how awful gay people are and how they are going to go to hell. (As if being bullied and rejected wasn't already enough of a hell for them) - In the church supposedly founded on a religion of Love?  It boggles my mind.  Many of those "pillars of the church" are there not to help others but instead to bolster their own self opinion.  After all they are "saved" and are going to heaven. You can see the self-satisfaction on their faces.

People constantly mistreat other people and many times without regard for what their actions do to the other person. How it can hurt them.  Some even do it unknowingly... Doesn't make it right because it hurts just as much.

I guess what I am saying is that we are responsible for the shooting in Arizona.  Our entire society.  Yes he is probably a deranged individual... I think you would have to be to do what he did.  But if our society worked he would have been noticed and someone would have gotten him the help he needed.  I will guarantee you that he was not born that way.  Children are born loving, caring. They have to be changed.  Watching the movie "The King's Speech yesterday the therapist got the Prince to open up about when he was a child.  He told him that he was not born with the stammer.  It turned out that his father had deliberately set out to make his children afraid of him..."I was afraid of my father and my children are going to be afraid of me."  He had also been teased by his older brother and pinched and punished by his nanny and made to change his natural left handedness to the right hand..  All of these things together in a sensitive, not yet five year old, caused him to be fearful and develop a stammar.  It was taught.  In the same way bullies are taught to bully.

I think that as a society we are going to have to change our ways.  We are going to have to watch ourselves and when we see behavior such as bullying we are going to have to stand up to it.  I was on Facebook the other day and someone posted some lyrics to a song.  I posted the next two lines (this is often done) and the next comment was from someone who simply put up the word "gay" -  I told him that I objected to the use of the word gay as a pejorative and told him why.  Needless to say the whole conversation was deleted by the originator of the conversation.  But I felt better in that I took a stand and in a calm and reasonable way stood up against something that has become pervasive in our society.

I can remember my cousin Chris telling some man that she would rather have her children hear him use the word fuck instead of the N word he had just used.  I was inspired that she would take that stance. I think more of us have to realize that words have consequences.  I will boycott those so-called comedians who bully.  Have you ever noticed just how many of them are bullies and justify it by saying "it's just a joke!" as if that excused their behavior.  It is not a joke when it hurts someone.

Several years ago I wrote a couple of poems  Here are a couple of lines from them:

you believe that everyone has a right to live a life free from harassment and hate

instead of living with humiliation and fear

and in another one I wrote:

I also have no doubt that if mankind wants to they can come together and use their collective knowledge to solve the problems we have caused.

When we take self-interest out of our reasoning

And put in sincere compassion and self sacrifice into the mix

And tolerate no exploitation of anyone ANYWHERE!

When we sit down together with our fellows and realize that everyone has the right to a good life, and then work toward solutions to our problems, not worrying about religious beliefs and how to please God-in-the sky and worry instead about how to bring the best life for everyone within the limited resources which we have.

I have no doubt that we can become the solution instead of the problem.

I was watching television  and I saw someone who was supposed to be a preacher begin talking about Muslims.  The hatred spewing from his mouth was palpable...not what I would expect from a Christian.

In Egypt the other day Muslims formed a human shield around a Coptic Christian Church.  They said  "We either live together or we die together."  That is what we deserve to expect from each other.  The acknowledgement that we are all Children of the One Father and if his children then we are brothers and sisters...and we should act like it.

Thanks for listening.  And for stopping by. Be gentle with one another. Cherish your friendships. Promote civility!  Hugs. j