Thursday, July 12, 2007

Peaks and Valleys



This picture reminds me of the way my life has been. There have been peaks and valleys and lately I feel like I have been on a roller coaster. I have had incredible "Highs" in my life.

Becoming a "Big Brother" at the age of 10 was one of them. Virginia Ruth (Ginny) was born July 1, 1952 in Atlantic, Iowa. I was staying with my grandparents in Ames and I can still recall the feeling and bring back a very vivid memory of that phone call telling me I had a little sister. She was a major joy in my life and I will always be grateful she is still in my life even though she now lives in Missouri in a wheelchair. I think she is grateful that she is living in Missouri also.

I remember before she was born asking my mother why she was getting so fat. It was explained later.

I think graduating from High School was one of them. There were only 17 in my class at Gilbert High School in 1959. The family gathered around and there was a big party. At that time I had incredible support from my mother's family. The only thing which would have made it better would have been if my father had bothered to come to the event. He was invited.

That same year we all went through an incredible low. My mother was in the hospital and I had just entered college and my grandfather and I had just sat down to eat salmon patties and creamed potatoes. (To this day I do not enjoy those foods, particularly in that combination.) My grandmother had gone to bed early with an "upset stomach" and all of a sudden she exclaimed "My God, I am awful sick. - And she was NEVER sick. She died within ten minutes while I tried to call for help (No 911 in those days). I can still remember my Aunt Jo coming up and hugging me in the driveway. She told me never to forget "Ma" - she had Ginny and Rick (her son) with her. She said the kids were too young and they would not remember her. Well I think they were wrong. Ginny, at least remember her. I spent about an hour on the side of the hill pulling on the grass and crying - In fact I still cry thinking about it.

The next morning I came upstairs and there was my Aunt Fran (up from Adel) hanging up the phone. As she walked away she repeated the words of the caller. "Oh no, not Sadie Cole." The next few days are a blur. It was like losing my mother who was in the hospital through all of this and could not even attend the funeral.

One of the things which helped me through it was what my grandmother had said when leaving the graveside service for her brother (Caroll Underwood) - she said, "That's not him in there."

Sometimes it is easier to remember the valleys than the peaks. I did not do well in college that year and took a "gap" year to decide what I wanted to do with my life. Part of the problem was the emotional toll which my grandmother's death took. Part of it was just immaturity.

Another real low was watching my grandfather die slowly over the next years as he mourned my grandmother and I will tell you this her death was hard on us but not nearly as hard as watching my grandfather go inch by inch. That is why I have a trusted friend ready to "pull the plug" when the time comes and I actually hope I go the way my grandmother did. I guess we don't really have a choice when you get right down to it.

I got a job at Collegiate Manufacturing and it developed into a better job because I saw a way of making a system they were using by consolidating several tasks and I got the new job. That was a "high" making a suggestion and implementing it and when I left they really wanted me to stay.

During this time the youth minister (Verda Aegeter) at First United Methodist Church suggested that I teach a Sunday School Class. I won't say that I was an unqualified success but I did throw out the curriculum (if someone dies it is your Christian duty to take them a pie) and did my own thing. (We studied Judaism as the roots of Christianity. That experience took me on an incredible which brought me many highs and a few lows. I decided to become a teacher. I went to State College of Iowa (now the University of Northern Iowa) That was mostly a 'high" culminating in Graduation in 1965 and a job teaching 5th grade in Marion, Iowa at Linn-Mar schools. There I met John Behrend who was also just starting out. He and I became good friends and as he had done his student teaching in Mexico We went to Mexico and traveled around by bus. It was an awesome adventure and we even wound up in a Mexican whorehouse. (Not to worry folks. The two farm boys from Iowa made a hasty retreat)

John was more adventuresome than I and I believe he became a courier for the State Department. Anyway I used to get postcards from all over. After I moved to Ames to teach for the next 34 years he used to stop by for brief visits. We had fun.

I had joined the Masons (you all know what that is - right? ) Eventually I got into the York Rite and was asked to become Grand Captain of the Host which lead to my becoming Grand High Priest in 1981. At the same time I was working in the Symbolic Lodge line and was Worshipful Master in 1980. Also was Worthy Patron several times.

A major high was being asked to join St. Bartholomew Conclave, Red Cross of Constantine. The Red Cross (in my opinion) is the highest award in York Rite Masonry and I considered it a higher honor than being Grand High Priest.

Not as many lows for a long time and then my mother got ill and had to start using oxygen and began her own slow decline it was hard. I will always be grateful for her friends who ignored the cannula dispensing oxygen and helping her through this time.

Working with friends at school and being appreciated by (some) people was always a "high" Then Ginny had her "accident" and wound up in a wheelchair and that began a period of way downs. There were a few "ups' but then I got ill and went into the hospital with flesh eating bacteria eating away at my leg. I am going to tell you this that the doctors I had literally saved my life. During that time the Lodge Brothers and parents taught me a lesson in friendship and brotherhood. They moved me from my old house to the new place I had to get to accommodate my sister's wheelchair.

Sometimes the highs are little things such as getting greeted by Bailey when I come home. Sometimes it is a comment in an e-mail from a friend who is a Past Grand High Priest. (yeah this sounds like I am blowing my own horn but this is not his "usual" comment to me. We have fun teasing one another.)

I read about your ring. Bob made an excellent choice in selecting you for that honor. You are unlike so many members of our our Craft........you expect or want nothing for your labors! I have always admired that about you. I have always admired your willingness to share your insight, knowledge and advice(when asked) with any member. I am very proud to have Jay Cole Simser for a brother and a friend.


He has no idea how much that comment meant to me. Thanks Tom I needed that!

Another friend and Brother and regular blog reader called me up and visited with me. As you (who are regular readers know I have been wallowing in a major "pity party" I no longer feel a part of my family and was missing my Mom and others and felt a major lack of emotional closeness with anyone. I am not complaining. It is just the way things are. Any way I "dumped" on Bob and opened up to him and he jump-started me by kicking my butt and letting me know how much he and others cared - I needed that and so I now feel that I can "climb back on the wagon again." When you get to low down in the valley you can't always find your own way out of it and I am really grateful for those who helped be start to the top again. I feel I am ready for the next "high"

I hope all of you who have bothered to read this rather long post are having "highs" Remember - you are loved. Hugs, jcs

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